Tuesday, February 10, 2004

High-protein blog.

I was so glad to read today in the WSJ that the late Dr. Atkins was a fat man that I went out and had a cheeseburger for lunch, which, truth be told, I don't eat all that often. I made the unfortunate choice of going to Herm's, a greasy spoon directly across the Chicago River from my office building. I remember now why I haven't been there in two or three years: low mediocre, even by Chicago greasy spoon standards. Herm's only virtue is its nearby location. Otherwise it's fairly far from the Platonic Ideal of the Greasy Spoon, which if I remember right was discussed in Book VI or VII of The Republic. (Maybe as part of the Allegory of the Diner.)

Cheeseburgers include dread carbs in the form of a bun, of course, but it seemed the right thing to eat. The Journal article was the perfect story at the right time -- at the height of the absurd Atkins diet bubble, which is now. Those few among future generations who care to read about our time will make wry note of this fad, just as we smile at chloroform parties.

Shouldn't speak ill of the dead. Well... I might anyway. I feel qualified to write about this, as a fat man myself. In fact, I'm just about the same size as the diet guru, height and weight, which puts us less than grossly, morbidly obese but more than current medical opinion thinks is good. I may well end up in ill-health like Dr. Atkins in 30 years, if I live that long. Which means I need to get busy to think up a brave, fly-in-the-face-of-a-callous-medical-establishment fad diet to make me rich (and fatter) before I die.

Poor old Dr. Atkins had heart problems, according to the article, besides being fat and 72. In a way, his heirs are fortunate he died in an accident, rather than slumping over a plate of beef and beef, which might have been bad for Atkins branding efforts.


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